2 Ways to Fight the Anxious What-ifs

Not too long ago, on an anxious-feeling Monday morning, I scratched out a little message about hope and the fear of the unknown.

I wrote it in the second person, but if you happened to read it when I posted it here the next day, you probably guessed that I wasn’t just writing to “you”—I was also writing to myself.

The previous week, I had been stressing about a mammogram I hadn’t even had yet. I had skipped this annual test the previous year for a variety of reasons, and I continued to put it off even after life settled down some.

In January, I had a sinus infection that caused a lot of coughing, which led to some worrisome (at least to me) aches in my chest. As it was getting close to the time of year when I usually have a mammogram anyway, I finally decided to go ahead and get it done so I could set my mind at ease about those pesky aches.

Even before the appointment, the what-ifs started assailing me. It wasn’t just, “What if they find something?” It was, “What if they find something now that they would have found last year if I had only had the test when I was supposed to have had it?”

(Please tell me I’m not the only one who does this.)

I’ve had to go back for follow-up ultrasounds a few times in the past, and everything has always been OK. There are no guarantees, of course, but the logical and reasonable response would have been to take one thing at a time.

I was having difficulty with that, though—almost to the point of ridiculousness.

I know the Bible verse by heart—the one about being anxious for nothing. Nothing! That pretty much covers everything, doesn’t it?

I’ve struggled mightily with worry in the past, but life experiences and the mysterious workings of the Holy Spirit have broken many of those chains. Not all of them, though.

I had the mammogram on a Friday, wrote the aforementioned blog post the following Monday, and got the “all-clear” letter from the imaging center a few days later.

All that worrying for nothing, right?

A friend later suggested that my battle with the fear of the unknown may have been connected to grief—turns out, her own anxiety was exacerbated and life just felt more unsettled when she was going through the grieving process.

It made sense and was even somewhat of a relief. Being aware of this connection might not eliminate future anxiety, but at least I can be on the lookout and perhaps recognize that this is what’s going on next time I’m overly anxious about something.

Not all fear of the unknown is rooted in grief, of course. These days, uncertainty swirls around us like a funnel cloud, threatening to pull us under with the most recent headlines about the coronavirus, the upcoming presidential election or the latest natural disaster.

Closer to home, perhaps the unsettling unknowns have to do with a child heading to college for the first time, aging parents with declining health, where our careers are going or how a serious illness is going to play out for us.

It’s enough to keep even the most stalwart believer up at night, worrying about all the what-ifs.

Philippians 4:6-7 assures us that when we come to our heavenly Father with our concerns—turning everything over to Him through “prayer and supplication”—the “peace of God that that surpasses all understanding will guard [our] hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.”

This kind of peace is for real. I’ve experienced it; you probably have too.

But God also “knows how we are formed and remembers that we are dust.” (Psalm 103:14) As finite human beings, sometimes we get anxious. And sometimes that anxiety is compounded because we can’t stop feeling anxious.

I don’t have any permanent solutions for this problem. But I can share a daytime promise and a nighttime prayer that might help, at least during the next 24 hours.

When the fear of the unknown assails you during the day, mediate on the powerful truths spelled out in a verse that has been stuck on my refrigerator door for as long as I can remember.

“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” (Deuteronomy 31:8)

And when your worries wake or keep you up at night, offer up a plea that author Jan Karon (of Mitford fame) calls the “prayer that never fails.”

“Thy will be done.”

Hang in there, friends. God is with us, and we can find rest in Him.

♥ Lois

P.S. I’m linking up this week with Purposeful Faith, #TellHisStory, InstaEncouragements, Recharge Wednesday, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.