Inside: My younger daughter is leaving for college in a week. How I’m feeling about that, plus timeless promises that can bolster our hearts through seasons of change. ~
One week from today, we’ll load the cars and take our younger daughter to college.
I’ve written some unbelievable words in my life—thoughts about events I still can’t wrap my head around, years after they happened. The idea of taking Molly to college does not fall into that category. It’s part of growing up—the next right step for her, and also for her parents.
And Yet …
A text from a friend in the same season of life is helping me articulate how I feel right now.
“How’s your mama heart as the day draws near to take Molly to JBU?” she wrote.
It’s good question. Last spring, as my sweet girl was wrapping up her final days of high school, I spent several weeks wondering, questioning and even worrying about how all this was going to feel and what I was going to do next.
Eventually, these anxious thoughts morphed into curiosity. I still don’t know how it’s all going to turn out, but rather than fret about it, I decided to take it as it came. One transition at a time, one decision at a time, one feeling at a time.
And Now Here We Are …
I love being Molly’s mom. She’s a unique person—fun, logical, creative, thoughtful, comfortable in her own skin. I will miss her terribly when she goes to college.
She will have the usual challenges to work through when she gets there—greater adjustments than she’s ever had to make, and many of them. She’ll manage, though, I’m sure of that.
At the same time, not knowing what all that is going to look like is tough for this mama’s heart, especially given my well-known propensity to read the end of the book first.
Midnight Musings
And then there are the thoughts that come to me in the middle of the night, the time when I’m most likely to process what’s going on in my life from every conceivable (and often unexpected) angle. Turns out, what I’m remembering most during these times is not Molly’s childhood, but my own transition to college.
I didn’t experience much of this when older daughter Lilly went to college in the fall of 2020. Maybe that’s because I was so happy she got to go at all, given what was happening in the world at the time.
And perhaps also because Molly was still at home. To use a possibly outdated colloquialism, the empty nest phase just hits different.
Where I End Up
Whatever the reason, that’s where my wakeful ponderings have taken me in the days leading up to Molly’s launch. I go round and round, memories chasing regrets chasing feelings, until—inevitably and thankfully—God brings me back to my favorite Bible verse.
“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” (Deuteronomy 31:8, NIV)
God’s presence comforted and protected me when I left home for the first time, and it will do the same for Molly. I can trust in that, and be grateful for it too.
Longtime Inspiration
Other scriptures are coming to mind during this season of transition too. Not surprisingly, the verses bolstering my heart the most also are those that have meant the most the longest.
There’s Psalm 139:16b: “All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”
This promise was foundational when we were waiting to become parents—anticipating the arrival of each daughter through adoption—and when my own parents were nearing the ends of their lives. Now, again, it steadies my heart when I remember it also applies to each member of my family in our current stages of life.
Finding Joy
Ditto for Psalm 16:11: “You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”
This verse gave me courage during the saddest, most exhausting season of my life to date. These days, in the midst of normal transitions and exciting possibilities, it reminds me that God is still guiding our steps and remains our source of joy, no matter what we’re feeling at any given moment.
Finally, as I consider all the growth that surely lies ahead for my girls—and for me, and you too—I can’t help but think about Philippians 1:6, a verse I’ve underlined in nearly every Bible I’ve ever owned:
“And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.”
I’m hopeful our lives will include many future blessings. I also understand that God often uses circumstances and events that we would never choose to accomplish His purposes and good works. Whatever that looks like for us and our loved ones, we can trust that He will see us through and hold us fast.
Just as He has always done.
♥ Lois
God’s presence comforted and protected me when I left home for the first time, and it will do the same for my daughter. I can trust in that, and be grateful for it too. Share on X I’m hopeful our lives will include many future blessings. I also understand that God often uses circumstances and events that we would never choose to accomplish His purposes and good works. Share on XP.S. I’m linking up this week with Inspire Me Monday, #tellhisstory, InstaEncouragements, Let’s Have Coffee and Grace & Truth.
20 comments
Ahhh, friend. This post speaks to my heart. Earlier this year, I too, was trying to figure out how I was going to feel and process the feelings when we take our youngest to college. I like what you said about prcessing one emotion, on thing at a time as they come. I realized I can’t anticipate and plan for how I’ll process something I’ve yet to experience.
Your go to verses are also mine. Loved seeing them here, and I loved reading your thoughtful words.
We are on the same wavelength, friend. Funny how we think we can control even our feelings! Here’s to taking one day at a time, one feeling at a time, one prayer for our kids at a time.
“The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” (Deuteronomy 31:8, NIV)
This really spoke to me this morning concerning a transition I am in. Thanks for sharing.
You’re welcome, Donna. It’s on repeat in my heart these days too! 🙂
I remember what it was like physically and emotionally to move sins to college. The last one comes with an unexpected catch in the heart. It’s a bigger transition for parents because in this moment we are beginning a new chapter of empty nesting.
Thank you for writing and sharing. God bless you as you transition and launch yourself into a new season.
You’ve described this process of launching the last one so beautifully, Lisa. That “unexpected catch in the heart”… I’ve definitely felt that several times! Thank you for your kind words, friend.
Praying for you all in this next season, Lois! What a gift that God is trustworthy in every stage. Thanks for sharing these encouragements!
So grateful for your prayers, Bethany. You’re right–God’s continual trustworthiness is definitely a gift!
Thank you for articulating some of what I’m feel over here in the exact same boat.
It’s quite a season of mental and emotional processing, isn’t it? Glad to know I’m not the only one!
My thoughts are with you as the day draws closer for taking Molly to school. I remember my own tears when we drove away from Auburn to leave Jenna at her own place just a few short years back. Yet oh the adventures we got to have in those college years with our girls! It’s all the emotions at once, good and hard together. I know you’ll have beautiful moments ahead as you watch Molly blossom on her own.
This is so true, Lisa: “It’s all the emotions at once, good and hard together.” I love thinking about the adventures we will have with Molly … and also Lilly when she goes to Spain. Thanks for your encouragement, friend.
Lois such an exciting time, but so filled with swirling emotions! In times like this Deut. 31:8 is so grounding for me. God’s Presence always brings me peace, and comfort even in my worst worries!
Me too, Donna. Praying for you today, friend …
Psalm 16:11 and Phil. 1:6 are two that have come up again and again through life. Another is Isaiah 41:10: “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
This season is so full of ups and downs and changes. It’s hard when we’ve talked with our kids almost every day about how their day went, what went on at school, etc., to not have that interaction as much any more. When our first two went to college, we didn’t even have cell phones and texts to keep in touch with. But gradually we settle into a new normal and find some perks of our new situation–even while we sometimes still miss the way things used to be.
I love Isaiah 41:10 too, Barbara. Thanks for your encouraging thoughts … we settled into the new normal when Lilly went to college, and I know we will find something similar with Molly. Even getting there is part of the letting-go journey, isn’t it?
It is amazing how certain Scriptures speak to our hearts time and time again. They are familiar words in the midst of the unfamiliar. They are unchanging truths and our anchor. Praying for all of you, Lois, as it will hit each of you differently and at different times.
I love how you put this, Joanne: “They are familiar words in the midst of the unfamiliar.” So comforting. Thanks so much for your prayers, friend. They are VERY much appreciated!
Such a great post, Lois, and filled with memories for those of us whose season is a bit ahead of ours. The scriptures you mention are ones I have underlined in my Bibles too and have been a source of steadying many times in my life. ♥️
Oh Pam … Your Bible must be a treasure trove of memories of when God spoke to your heart through His Word. I know mine is!