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Blessed are Those Who Limp

by Lois Flowers May 3, 2016
by Lois Flowers

I have a bad foot.

I’ll spare you pictures and wordy descriptions. Just know that I had to wear corrective shoes when I was a kid. That I didn’t get my first pair of tennis shoes until I was in the third grade. That sports involving running were pretty much out of the question when I was growing up (and not just because of a lack of interest and athletic ability).

cutiesI now recognize the sacrifices my parents must have made to purchase those shoes for me. Back then, though, style was more important to me than the health of my feet, and I eventually stopped wearing them.

When I hit my mid 30s, however, painful bursitis in my hip led me to seek medical help. Upon learning that I had been walking on the outsides of my feet my whole life to compensate for the messed-structure of my left foot, the doctor recommended custom orthotics.

“It will improve the quality of your life,” he told me.

He was right. While the inserts do limit my choice of footwear, wearing them has dramatically improved how I feel. They even allow me to run on the treadmill regularly, which also has enhanced my life in more ways than I can count.

I say all that to say this. At my house, I’ve always been the one prone to limping.

Until recently, that is.

One day in early March, Lilly’s foot mysteriously started hurting. She could point to no sudden accident or injury. Before P.E., it was fine; after P.E., it hurt so badly she could hardly walk.

The family doctor diagnosed tendonitis. For a month, Lilly wore a brace, took anti-inflammatory medicine and reluctantly sat on the sidelines at her beloved ballet class.

Then this little foot story took an interesting turn none of us could have predicted.

On April Fool’s Day, younger sister Molly somehow fell off our very low back deck and fractured her foot.

The following Monday, the podiatrist put Lilly in a boot she had to wear continually for three solid weeks. And the very next day, Molly was outfitted with a lovely pink walking cast.

After going their whole lives with no major injuries of any sort, both girls were limping around in some serious orthopedic footwear. It was bizarre, to say the least.

Though frustration and disappointment cropped up from time to time, Lilly and Molly handled their hobbled conditions remarkably well. Randy and I did our best to encourage them, while keeping a sharp eye out for obstacles that might sideline one of us.

All the limping reminded me of Jacob, the biblical patriarch who suffered an unusual hip injury when he was on his way to meet his twin brother Esau after a long separation. In a Winter 2011 Leadership Journal article titled “Don’t Waste a Crisis,” John Ortberg offers some powerful thoughts on this narrative that I hope will add a bit of eternal perspective to my tale of family foot woe. He writes:

Jacob and Esau were separated by their struggle for the blessing. Eventually this struggle led to murderous threats and years of estrangement. Finally Jacob was coming home. In the strange story he meets and wrestles with a mysterious stranger, to whom Jacob says, “I will not let you go unless you bless me.”

Jacob is given a blessing, but also given another strange gift. His hip is wrenched. The next day he was limping because of his hip.

He looked up to see his brother. The text says that “Esau ran to meet Jacob.”

Jacob could not run. His running days were over. The rest of his life he would walk with a limp.

“Esau ran to meet Jacob and embraced him; he threw his arms around his neck and kissed him. And they wept” (Genesis. 33:4).

Perhaps something about Jacob’s vulnerability healed Esau’s heart in a way that Jacob’s cleverness and strength never could.

Jacob was given a wound, and a blessing. Or maybe his wound WAS his blessing.

Maybe you will bless more people with your limp than with your strength.

Blessed are you who limp, for you shall walk with God.

♥ Lois

May 3, 2016 14 comments
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Song of the Month: “In the Waiting”

by Lois Flowers May 1, 2016
by Lois Flowers

Song of the month header 1

There’s something about this time of year that takes me back. Back to the days when the longing of my heart went unfulfilled for far longer than I ever expected.

Three years of infertility plus almost two years of waiting to complete our first adoption equals, well, a very long time. It usually seems like a distant memory, but when Mother’s Day rolls around, I can’t help but remember.

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May 1, 2016 6 comments
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Sometimes, You Have to Put Yourself on Autopilot

by Lois Flowers April 26, 2016
by Lois Flowers

We have a new driver at our house.

Once Lilly turned 14—the legal age to learn to drive in Kansas—she started studying the state driver’s handbook. She took countless practice tests online and passed the official permit exam on her first try.

old van

She’s handled herself (and the family minivan) well during training drives with Randy. There’s nothing very exciting about these excursions—they’ve mostly just circled the mammoth parking lot of a mostly vacant mall near our home, over and over again. But Lilly understands that it’s only through practice that driving becomes intuitive, so the repetition doesn’t seem to bother her.

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April 26, 2016 26 comments
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If You Need the Gift of Hope Today

by Lois Flowers April 19, 2016
by Lois Flowers

When it comes to love languages, gifts and words are where it’s at for me. If you really want to fill my emotional tank to overflowing, find a way to combine the two. Card, note, book, wall hanging, blog comment—it makes no difference. It’s the thought behind the message, not the format, that speaks to my heart.

gifts

Given my affinity for words, I suppose it’s not surprising that I also love a good quote. I suspect the same is true for many of you, so today, I want to share a few personal favorites. Consider this post a gift basket of hope-filled thoughts—carefully selected by me, just for you.

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April 19, 2016 28 comments
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Why Faith is Not the Opposite of Fear

by Lois Flowers April 12, 2016
by Lois Flowers

chair on porch“Faith is the opposite of fear.”

“Faith and fear cannot occupy the same space.”

I’ve been running across such phrases lately, but the more I hear them, the less inclined I am to think they tell the whole story.

The thing about opposites is that they are concrete and clearly defined. Up is the opposite of down. Hot is the opposite of cold. Crooked is the opposite of straight. Right is the opposite of wrong.

Fear is a feeling. If a feeling can have an opposite, it would have to be another feeling. Like happy and sad, perhaps.

Faith is a choice. It’s not some kind of feeling that flows from believing; it’s the decision to believe. For me, that’s a huge distinction.

I’m not suggesting that choices don’t have opposites. I can love or I can hate. I can forgive or I can hold a grudge. Those are clear and opposite alternatives.

But connecting faith (a choice) to fear (a feeling) in some sort of either-or scenario is not very helpful, especially for people who battle anxiety or whose personalities don’t lend themselves to bold emotional expressions. As a woman who sometimes struggles with body chemicals that negatively affect my emotions, I can vouch for this.

When I can physically feel anxiety coursing through my veins—simply because of a change in my hormone levels and not because I’m facing anything particularly troubling or difficult—I don’t stop believing God loves me. I don’t stop trusting that He will make a way for me or help me overcome my anxiousness.

If anything, I hang on to those beliefs even more in those moments. The feelings of fear associated with anxiety come and go, but my faith remains. And to suggest otherwise can lead to feelings of guilt and unworthiness that are usually unwarranted.

Here’s the thing. Faith is not reciting affirmations or thinking warm thoughts about God. It’s not crying tears of joy in a worship service or giving a bold testimony in front of a huge crowd (though those can be expressions of faith for some people).

At the moment of salvation, faith is a gift from God—wholly unearned and undeserved (Ephesians 2:8-9).

After that, it’s choosing to believe what God’s Word says about Him, even when we haven’t sensed His presence in a long, long time.

It’s choosing to trust God when it hurts, when it makes no sense, when we cannot see Him working.

It’s acting on what’s right—on what we know God wants us to do—even if we are half scared out of our minds to do it.

It’s taking that first step, then the next, then the next.

You can’t tell me that Daniel and his friends Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego weren’t absolutely terrified when confronted with the pack of hungry lions or the super-hot furnace. But they believed God was with them, and they acted on that. They didn’t let their fear keep them from doing what was right.

The Israelites, on the other hand, weren’t banned from entering the Promised Land because they were afraid of the giants there. They were banned because they refused to enter when God told them to go. Their fear didn’t reveal their lack of faith, their inaction did.

When I’m afraid or anxious, the promise of 2 Timothy 1:7 gives me strength and hope: “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

Not too long ago, I noticed something about this verse that I’d never considered before. In describing what God gives us instead of fear, there’s no mention of faith.

Power? Yes. Love? Check. A sound mind? Definitely very helpful. But nothing about faith.

Maybe that’s because faith is not the opposite of fear.

Nor is it the absence of fear.

It’s a choice that guides our actions.

♥ Lois

Faith is a choice. It’s not some kind of feeling that flows from believing; it’s the decision to believe. Share on X The feelings of fear associated with anxiety come and go, but my faith remains. And to suggest otherwise can lead to feelings of guilt and unworthiness that are usually unwarranted. Share on X
April 12, 2016 42 comments
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When Grace Interrupted My Pity Party

by Lois Flowers April 5, 2016
by Lois Flowers

Last week, I wrote about dying to self and how this many-layered theological concept became personal to me during a stressful time of my life. Now, I explain how an unexpected epiphany brought hope and freedom to my dry heart—and just might do the same for you.

Dying to self

I continued thinking about dying to self as the months went by. We even started talking about it as a family. We called it “DTS-ing” for short, referring to unselfish acts like choosing the smaller cookie or letting someone else go first—intentional efforts to put others ahead of our own desires, even for the little things.

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April 5, 2016 32 comments
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As long as we’re here on planet Earth, God has a good purpose for us. This is true no matter how old we are, what we feel on any given day or what we imagine anyone else thinks about us. It can be a struggle, though, to believe this and live like it. It requires divine strength and eternal hope. And so I write, one pilgrim to another, in an effort to encourage us both as we navigate the long walk home together.

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